Wishes

I wish I did really feel like home at home.

It just feels like I'm adapting here even though it's been almost 5 years since Umi got married.

The only place that feels like home is UTM. Which is why I spent so much time and money decorating my room there.

I feel at ease in my spot on my cozy bed, reading on my swing cocoon.

Italy Here I Come!

Oh

My

Lord!!


So me, kakak and Umar will be going to Italy for our semester break where we'll be touring around Italy.

Rome

Cinque Terre

Spend a night in Lugano, Switzerland

Venice

Naples


I'll be going to Lizzie's locationssss!

And thank you Allah for introducing me to Farah. This super awesome Singaporean baker who can make perrrrfect crimson chrysanthemums on her cake. I can barely make mine on a cupcake. Haih.

She went to Italy a few months back and is willing to guide me to great places and where to get halal delizioso pastas and other Italian cuisines.

Bismillah, help make ease for us and purify our hearts please.

Worthless tears.

Just frickin stop Nad for God's sake!

That feeling when you've finally had enough.

Emosi tak emosi.

I want to remember this feeling forever so that I can truly learn my lesson.

Buasir

Sakit gila.

Tak suka orang tegur muka pucat. 

Thus I choose to lock myself in my room today.

And then I came across this tonight,

Yang Allah akan tarik 3 benda bila sakit,

Keceriaan wajah

Selera makan

Dosa...

Tak kisahlah selera makan xde, bila makan pun muntah balik.

Tak kisah lah darah banyak hilang skrg ni.

Tak kisah lah badan lemah tahap rasa diri ni macam zombie.

Dosa hilang apa. 

Selfish Feelings

People can be not selfish easily when it comes to physical sacrifices. Like sacrificing time and energy for the sake of other people.

But what's super hard is sacrificing feelings. Where you can be not selfish by  pushing away the things you feel, that feeling like the unfairness you feel you experience, for the happiness of other people. 

That's a sacrifice I can barely do. And that's something a certain someone in my life find difficult to do too.

And "sorry" has become meaningless.

This intolerence should end. 

Cancer

I'm freaking out.

I don't like seeing blood.

And I don't like the doctor telling me to diagnose for cancer.