That feeling when you've finally had enough.

Emosi tak emosi.

I want to remember this feeling forever so that I can truly learn my lesson.

Buasir

Sakit gila.

Tak suka orang tegur muka pucat. 

Thus I choose to lock myself in my room today.

And then I came across this tonight,

Yang Allah akan tarik 3 benda bila sakit,

Keceriaan wajah

Selera makan

Dosa...

Tak kisahlah selera makan xde, bila makan pun muntah balik.

Tak kisah lah darah banyak hilang skrg ni.

Tak kisah lah badan lemah tahap rasa diri ni macam zombie.

Dosa hilang apa. 

Selfish Feelings

People can be not selfish easily when it comes to physical sacrifices. Like sacrificing time and energy for the sake of other people.

But what's super hard is sacrificing feelings. Where you can be not selfish by  pushing away the things you feel, that feeling like the unfairness you feel you experience, for the happiness of other people. 

That's a sacrifice I can barely do. And that's something a certain someone in my life find difficult to do too.

And "sorry" has become meaningless.

This intolerence should end. 

Cancer

I'm freaking out.

I don't like seeing blood.

And I don't like the doctor telling me to diagnose for cancer.

Some people can really hurt you can't they.

Stay happy anyways Nadhirah.

Shamim

No matter what happens,

I would treasure the things we had, the times we went through together.

From the beginning of our friendship, I was really really fond of you. It always felt comfortable around you and my heart always skipped a beat whenever I even just hear your name. It's been over 5 years and this skipping habbit my heart has for you never changed except for beating faster.

You're one of the best things that has ever happened to me.

You've been the bestest friend that I never imagined having. You are the bestest friend that I can't imagine having more of.

You've been like home to me, never minding my drama, never judging my anger, and never bothered with my craziness. You never seem to care about the number of fights we had. You still think we're the happiest, most perfect pair there could ever be.

It's so tough that we can't be together.

We might just be hormonal. 

And it might just be mere lust from blackened, sinful hearts.

Just let time tell where we'll be going. Keep improving ourselves, our iman.

Let Allah decide what's best. Despite the ugly hearts we both have, Allah will still help us.

Have faith.

Dear Future Husband

You gotta know how to treat me like a lady

Even when I'm acting crazayy

Tell me everything's alright :)